How to choose family

Brian opened the door for me and I slid into the back seat of a taxi cab for our 10-minute ride deeper into downtown San Diego.

Are you here for business or for vacation, the driver asked as we passed palm trees and then drove by street lamps that curved into modern art.

Both, we answered. I would spend my day attending a conference, while my husband walked to a maritime museum and searched for the best seafood.

I make sure to go on vacation every year, he said. It’s important to get away, and I have family I need to see.

In Denmark. In London. In parts of Canada.

I have about 1,200 family members, he said as we passed a Marriott and a Hyatt. Some people I haven’t seen in 22 years. Some I’ve only spoken to on the phone or on the computer.

“How many brothers and sisters do you have?” Brian asked.

Four brothers and two sisters, he said, before telling us how many children and grandchildren each of them had. And he knew details. How this one wanted a boy after so many girls. How that one told her mother such-and-such.

They weren’t just names written in cursive on the family tree, they were written in his heart. They were family. All of them.

Brian paid him for the ride, and I stepped up on the curb and silently thanked God for the reminder that family is only as distant as we allow ourselves to be.

If you are looking for ways to stay in touch with young friends and family members, I’ve written about that here – and I’ve spent time talking about ways to write more letters, too.

Today, though, the kind people at Kawaii Box are making it easier for one of you to reach out to family. They are giving away a one-month subscription to Kawaii Box, which sends a box each month packed with 10 to 12 cute stationery and kid items from Japan, along with a fun treat to sample.

If you need a birthday gift, consider a one-time box for $19.80 – or subscribe all year for $17.90 a month. Shipping is included in the cost but consider ordering early if it is a gift. A box that is traveling that far can get delayed or lost. (Their customer service is great and they will help you if run into any problems, but you don’t want a young friend to have to wait!)

So, would you like a chance to win? Click here!

Tired of striving and pushing? How to find rest…

I quickly learned that only the early get seats at Social Media Marketing World, and the rest line the walls until the fire marshal gets nervous. So, I sat in my seat on the left side of the aisle seven minutes before Park Howell was set to take the stage and show us how to tell better stories.

I was typing out a story of own on my phone when a woman put her bags down and sat in the chair in front of me. Before I could finish and hit send, she had turned to face me and introduce herself.

She started with her name and followed up with where she worked and what she did there. Then came the talk of all the awards they had won recently.

About three minutes in, she asked my name and what I do for a living. I dug for a business card.

I’m Marketta and I work for a non-profit that serves people with developmental disabilities. We’re also expanding into child care and home health care, particularly for those who are older.

“I’m the caretaker for my mother,” she said.

That’s important work, I replied.

And with the word work, she was back to talking about hers. When the seats filled in to my right, she started the process again.

Striving.

Pushing.

Selling.

It made me, an introvert, feel exhausted on her behalf. I took the woman’s business card and dropped it in my bag, and I turned my attention to the speaker who told us we can’t be the hero of our company’s story. The hero has to be the customer, the one we serve.

The One we serve.

When I cast myself in the starring role, I leave no room for the hero to remind me that I’m already valuable. I’m already heard. I’m already loved by the One who created it all, who says to come to Him to find rest and peace.

Instead I find myself working hard to peddle the idea that I’m worthy. I want my product, my image, my suggestions, to be chosen. I forget the hero, the savior, says I already belong.

Turns out striving, pushing and selling aren’t just terms for marketers and people networking. They’re terms for me when I get the story wrong and carry the weight and the responsibility of the hero – a role I was never meant to play.